Contrast Deepens Our Relationship with Ourselves

Day 7 Autumn Cleanse October 7:
10:00 AM Core strengthening exercises
11:00 4.5 mile walk and run at the beach, with 1 mile of it slow run - nice, soft rain coming down
12:15 PM 1 Quart Master Cleanser with 1 quart warmed water, 5 tablespoons fresh lemon juice, pulp (and seeds); now lessening the lemon from 6 to 5 tablespoons; 4 tablespoons grade B maple syrup; and 1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper spicy
2:15 PM 1 Quart Master Cleanser
Afternoon: Extraordinary session of reflexology with Irina Breslav
40 Minute sauna
5:45 PM 8 oz. Master Cleanser
7:00 PM 16 oz. Master Cleanser
Total: 2 Quarts, 24 oz.
Day 8 Autumn Cleanse October 8:
11:45 AM 1 Quart Master Cleanser
2:30 PM 1 Quart Master Cleanser
7:00 PM 1 Quart Master Cleanser
Total: 3 Quarts

As some of you may know, I fractured my metatarsal (i.e. broken foot) during the beginning of July and spent the summer healing my broken bone. That meant no running, swimming, or yoga; no rebounding on the trampoline when it was messy outside. I wore a specialized sandal (in lieu of a boot) and used a cane. It was an intense time and a time of quiet contemplation.
Some of my readers may have seen the video of joy that I shot as I was about to go swimming in the Long Island Sound, when my foot was finally healed enough to swim.
This past Friday, I went running for the first time in three months; while cleansing, of course!
Those who know me well and have followed my blog know I am an avid runner and athelete, lover of movement, exercise and the outdoors, and have been running on and off since I was sixteen. You might have read when I blogged about shifting my entire relationship with winter a few years ago, while healing a broken heart, simply by running outside all winter; whether forty degrees or six degrees. This relationship with winter moved from "I can't stand it," to become the most intimate and adoring relationship, which unbelievably, I have been sad to see go the last couple of seasons (even though I am a beach bum).
Running is "in my heart, it's in my soul," and it will "be my friend till I grow old," and beyond. My father ran until he was seventy nine. He was my first running partner. On Friday, I put on my old best friends, my running shoes (saucony-s) and walked over to the beach. Very carefully, I began a slow run once around; just under a mile. My goal right now is to continue to realign my foot after months of it being dormant. Where in counseling, I am often helping people to recondition, reframe or clear our their old "cellular belief systems," those experiences housed in our bodies that cause us suffering, in my case, I am doing the opposite. I am reigniting my body's cellular memory, specifically that foot, to run and move the way it used to. This requires a slow process, literally, meaning that I am starting to run very slowly, just to have my foot re-remember what it felt like logging all those miles in its shoe; what each step and bounce was like for every muscle, nerve, tendon and ligament. It's part of my personal foot therapy.
Here I was, both on Friday and Sunday, running one quarter or one half of my usual speed with a huge smile on my face; feeling the feeling of well being that comes when one is doing something they love. Much like my relationship with food, it was a time of Ecstatic Running! even though I was lightly jogging. When we are aligned with what is right for us, it's not about the perfection; it's about the sheer bliss of the process. I was as exuberant as if I had just run a half marathon.
Contrast is a wonderful thing. When we get back that which we temporarily lost, the appreciation we have is far larger than it was. I thought I was passionately grateful for every minute of every run I have had in the past, and I was, but the gratitude I had on those two days outmeasured even that. The difference was that for three months, I had met myself where I was at, and learned to love myself through my limitations.
It was a kind of cleansing of the soul to go through the process. I loved myself even more for all parts of me; the whole and the broken; the light and the shadow.
As I wind down from my eighth day of no solid food, I wonder what I will feel this Thursday morning, when I bite into my first meal. I know that the first food I ate after my 31-day juice feast, which was only some soaked organic prunes, tasted like the nectar of the gods. I look forward to experiencing the act of eating on a whole new level, and deepening my relationship with food and my body. Each new path upon which we embark changes us forever. Food is only a metaphor for the rest of our lives, and I thank God I can transform all my relationships, most especially that with myself, through my ever-evolving relationship with food.